“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”
Mae West
I was in a librairie, bookstore, the other day waiting in line to pay for a pad of paper when I noticed the woman in front of me was holding what I thought was a perplexing choice of books: Jon Kabat-Zinn’s “Mindful Meditation” and the second edition of “1,000 Places to Visit Before you Die”. Mindfulness has become a movement, part of the zeitgeist, a meme whose essential, underlying concept is focusing on the moment, being in the zone or going with the flow. It seems counterintuitive, then, for anyone to also embrace the notion of a “bucket list”, another phenomenon that’s become part of our social vocabulary. Thinking about the present while also thinking about the future can be, at the very least, bewildering.
When younger, I learned how to sew my own clothes, took up photography, studied painting, wrote poetry, refined my cooking skills, practiced yoga and became a master gardener. While setting and reaching goals was extremely positive and worthwhile, all-embracing happiness eluded me. I was optimizing my life by collecting skills instead of following my heart. I was constantly feeling like something was missing.
Then one day I read a passage from an essay by Wendell Berry, “…and the world cannot be discovered by a journey of miles, no matter how long, but only as a spiritual journey, a journey of one inch, very arduous and humbling and joyful, by which we arrive at the ground at our own feet and learn to be at home.” It suddenly dawned on me that I was putting off my happiness until one day in the unknowable future, instead of appreciating that my day – was already filled with magic, beauty, pleasure and joy. I had everything I needed to be happy, right here, right now. I had enough.
But, how can you live in the moment when you’re not aware of the moment? By s l o w i n g down. Our society has created an intimidating fear of failure syndrome leaving us anxiously striving for some unreachable goal which in turn creates an overwhelming sense of unworthiness – we’re not good enough, smart enough, beautiful enough or happy enough. I began a voyage of discovery by re-discovering myself from the inside out. I realized I had enough because I was enough.
I encourage you to take a moment to recognize that your life is already abundant with friends, love, laughter, patience, strength and knowledge, to give up filling your bucket and instead wander the landscape of your soul. When you look on the bright side, place value on relationships and not material wealth, give to others, honor getting lost and following your passions, you’ll fall deeply in love with the life you have because you’ll see that you already have enough…

Sue–happy Valentine’s day to you. Why do I find living in the moment so hard? I’m trying but my monkey mind seems to roam at will, busying itself with other items well beyond the realm of the moment. But I’m trying–and your wonderful photo essay will remind me to center myself and live in the moment. Much love to you in this chilly month of February.
I’m there Sue and it feels great…. Happy Valentines Day to you …This is so beautiful what you have shared….We Love You ! XXOO!
Jesus promsed His deciples 3 things…1. They would be entirely FEARLESS….#2 They would be absurdly HAPPY…..#3. and they would be Always in TROUBLE!….giggle! That’s me to a “T”…
I loved this essay, Sue. I couldn’t quite put my finger on the reason that I don’t like the notion of a bucket list and you summarized it nicely. I try to live in the moment, seize opportunities that seem worthwhile, strive to be of service, and if I think something is important, do it.
I appreciate all of your comments. I think in the context of the movie, doing what you’ve always wanted to do before you “kick the bucket” worked as a plot line, but in our every day lives it just creates anxiety. Why wait to do what you really want to do? Why not “follow your bliss” and see where it leads? Why not get lost? I know there are financial considerations, but a
t our ages, we all know it’s the journey and not the destination, pardon the cliché. Don’t create more stress by worrying about monkey mind chatter – it’s perfectly normal – see where your thoughts take you, see if there’s a common thread, then focus on the thread. I bet you’ll disappear into the flow without even knowing it.